My New Year's Resolutions,....

Well, not exactly mine, but the one I wish some people would actually aspire to,...

Andy Reid - I will take classes on clock management and human resources in the off-season.

Yankees GM Brian Cashman - I will memorize the book "The Art of the Deal" from cover to cover.

Fox 29 Anchor Mike Jerrick - I will behave myself and stop being a poster child for sexual harassment in the workplace.

Fox 29 Reporter Jennaphr Fredricks - I will stop being the poster child for dumb blondes everywhere.

Fox 29 Meteorologist Sally Ann Mosey - I will more closely read the exit clause on my contract.

Nancy Pelosi - since I'll have nothing to do for two years, I'll take up horticulture and learn the different between grass and AstroTurf.

Rachel Madcow - I will finally realize that sexually-ambiguous fashion went out when the Eurythmics broke up.

Fat Eddie Rendell - I will attend a REAL diet program, instead of sticking my foot in my mouth as a substitute for another free hoagie.