2011 - The Year We Take Back Congress and Make Obama's Life Hell!

Sunday, September 28, 2008

LA-LA-LA! No Media Bias! LA-LA-LA!

Aging stoner/loser bible Rolling Stone drops more mud on Sarah's bouffant:

It's utterly predictable that the aging-hippie magazine Rolling Stone would publish an article titled "Mad Dog Palin" with a cartoon of Alaska's governor as a female bulldog with spiky teeth. It's predictable their staff attack dog Matt Taibbi would find her "symphony of sneering remarks at the convention was like watching Gidget address the Reichstag." What may not be predictable in this Year of Obama is their arrogant Bill Maher-esque lack of faith in the idiotic American people. This is their version of Palin and her populace:

She’s a puffed-up dimwit with primitive religious beliefs who had to be educated as to the fact that the Constitution did not exactly envision government executives firing librarians. Judging from the importance progressive critics seem to attack to these revelations, you’d think these were actually negatives in modern American politics. But Americans like politicians who hate books and see the face of Jesus in every tree stump. They like them stupid and mean and ignorant of the rules. Which is why Palin has only seemed to grow in popularity as more and more of these revelations have come out.

Since the Sixties rag is utterly in the tank for Obama, readers also find this comparison:

So sure, Barack Obama might be every bit as much a slick piece of imagineering as Sarah Palin. The difference is in what the image represents. The Obama image represents tolerance, intelligence, education, patience with the notion of compromise and negotiation, and a willingness to stare ugly facts right in the face, all qualities we’re actually going to need in government if we’re going to get out of this huge mess we’re in.

Here’s what Sarah Palin represents: being a fat f—ing pig who pins "Country First" buttons on his man titties and chants "U-S-A! U-S-A!" at the top of his lungs while his kids live off credit cards and Saudis buy up all the mortages in Kansas.

Taibbi greeted enthusiasm for Palin at the convention in St. Paul as the unveiling of deep cynicism:

Here’s the thing about Americans. You can send their kids off by the thousands to get their balls blown off in foreign lands for no reason at all, saddle them with billions in debt year after congressional year while they spend their winters cheerfully watching game shows and football, pull the rug out from under their mortgages, and leave them living off their credit cards and their Wal-Mart salaries while you move their jobs to China and Bangalore.

And none of it matters, so long as you remember a few months before Election Day to offer them a two-bit caricature culled from some cutting-room-floor episode of Roseanne as part of your presidential ticket. And if she’s a good enough likeness of a loudmouthed Middle American archetype, as Sarah Palin is, John Q. Public will drop his giant sized bag of Doritos in gratitude, wipe the sizzlin’ picante dust from his lips and rush to the booth to vote for her. Not because it makes sense, or because it has a chance of improving his life or anyone else’s, but simply because it appeals to the low-humming narcissism that substitutes for his personality, because that image on TV reminds him of the mean brainless slob he sees in the mirror every morning.

Sarah Palin is a symbol of everything that is wrong with the modern United States. As a representative of our political system, she’s a new low in reptilian villainy, the ultimate cynical masterwork of puppeteers like Karl Rove. But more than that, she is a horrifying symbol of how little we ask for in return for the total surrender of our political power. Not only is Sarah Palin a fraud, she’s the tawdriest, most half-assed fraud imaginable, 20 floors below the lowest common denominator, a character too dumb even for daytime TV – and this country is going to eat her up, cheering every step of the way. All because most Americans no longer have the energy to do anything but lie back and allow ourselves to be jacked off by the calculating thieves who run this grasping consumer paradise we call a nation.

So much for the hippies mouthing "all you need is love / love is all you need." Would anyone gleefully walk into a ballot box and vote for a candidate who sprayed this kind of hate at them from the podium of a public speech? How exactly does Jann Wenner or the Obama enthusiasts at Rolling Stone think this will help Obama get elected? They must assume none of their opponents have enough literacy to read their rock and roll ravings.

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